We’ve had a bit of a potty mouth lately, we know. But this list was suggested and we couldn’t resist. Here are the bottom 8 fart smells that come from the human asshole.
8. Red Bull Fart
Maybe you had a big weekend of clubbin’ with Persians and Armenians on Sunset and threw back some Red Bull vodkas. Or maybe you’re some extreme skateboard dude. Or a college student cramming for some unimportant final. Whatever the case, if you drink a bunch of energy drinks, your farts inevitably smell like that stuff. It’s probably the Guarana. Tisk tisk. Or the Persians.
7. Potluck Casserole Fart
That’s when your farts smell like you ate old people groceries.
6. Vegas Fart
Your farts smell like you had a weekend of secrets and regrets in Sin City. Did you lose your kid’s college fund on blackjack? Did you dabble in any cocaine or hookers? Either way, your Vegas trip has left you dead on the inside and the smell of that is coming out your butthole.
5. Salami Fart
Your farts smell like cured sausage. And you’re probably Italian.
4. Cauliflower Fart
For some unknown reason, you ate steamed vegetables. Now the whole world knows. Well, maybe just everyone on your bus.
3. Hot Garbage Fart
Your ass smells like a dumpster left out in the sun in August. You need to stop eating at Jack in the Box and you’re also probably dying of something bad.
2. The Egg Fart
This one is a room-clearer, for sure. 100% of the people who smell it will complain. Especially since you can almost taste egg farts.
1. Human Shit Fart
You can tell the difference between what a fart is supposed to smell like and what actual feces smells like. Go to the bathroom. You probably have some cleanup to do.
Comedy.com’s ListMaster is Loafie McTurd. He has a PhD from Harvard.
